new pics and RAD disasters

our ferocious beast

i asked jackson to smile for a birthday picture, this is what i got. whatever!

i woke up late thismorning-730. yogi let me sleep in. woohoo! when i woke up, it sounded like controlled chaos downstairs, so i threw some clothes on and cleaned my room, stripped & re made the bed, put lots of clothes away & neatened up before coming down.... then when i came down un controlled chaos ensued. jackson had been VERY hyper, was nit picking, being unruly and obnoxious, he had kendyl screaming while spouse was trying to make pancakes and control Shawn. right after i came down the stairs kendyl got hurt and started crying and thats when it got ugly. yogi was reprimanding both of them and told them to get into the kitchen and sit down. i started to tell jackson that he was being TOO HYPER and needed to take some deep breaths and calm himself down before joining us at the table. he plopped himself down anyway & started that under-the-breath- crap, spouting off at(i think) both of us, which is so damn aggravating to me and he knows it so i try to ignore.. but i told him that if he had something to say he needed to speak up. at that point, something near jackson went flying off the table and hit the antique glass door of my china closet and all hell broke loose. my husband grabbed him, smacked him and tossed him outdoors into the sandbox before i could even react. turns out that it had been an AWFUL morning but i had no idea. why didnt he come get me????? anyway, i went out after them, yogi was in his boxers screaming at jackson out in the yard, when i saw the pastor next door getting into his truck for church i thought i would die right there. i told yogi to get in the house right now, GET IN HERE NOW YOGI! he was flippin'. he didn't even hear me so i grabbed him and dragged him up the back steps, he was shaking and totally out of control. i do this every day so i know when i am about to blow and ive learned ways to stay cool, keep myself in check and get out if i need to. hes only here on sundays pretty much and as mellow as he is, he holds in all that frustration month after month no matter what jackson-or the other kids- pull ( we are not happy with Doug right now either!)and about once a year, like clockwork, he finally blows his stack and we all pay. but did it have to be today? we were headed out to an amusement park for jacks birthday, even though money is very tight, ya cant just ignore your kids brithday. yogi had to work yesterday, but we had jackson's favorite dinner-Boston market- and held off on the cake and park until today. the fact is, jackson sabotaged the whole day intentionally and i know it. i even told him so and he said "thats right!". we all sat at the table and talked. i made them apologize to each other and jackson actually did, which surprised me. when i told him he needed to take responsibility for HIS part in the whole thing he was like NO WAY, but he admitted a few minutes later that he was gearing up for a fight all morning and it all went according to his evil plan. UGH. yogi apologized for losing control of himself and hitting-which is a huge no no in our house- and then we came up with a signal that daddy will use when he is about to lose it and jacky will go to his room to chill out. even after the talk though, the entire rest of the day was shitty, nobody talked to each other, we were all on edge and grouchy and we all just kept our distance from one another. we stayed outside end entertained the kids, jackson mostly played basketball and the day just dissappeared. yay. we never get to do anything fun. i wanted to go to the place anyway and just move on, but Yogi didnt think we should go since jackson refused to speak all day long, soooooooo i had to agree.... sort of. the day sucked. RAD sucks. being broke sucks too. teething really sucks.

but i did sneak out during naptime to get a new camera! used my credit card siiggghhh. i got a few cute pictures!