200 facts about me

Erin says i have to do this, in honor of my 200th post. i will try:

1. My parents were only 19 & 20 when i was born. they had been married for almost 2 years.
2. my sister is 13 months older than me, to the hour.
3. my sister's birth kept my Dad out of the Vietnam draft.
4. when i was 4 my mom had her tubes tied and i cried. i wanted a brother and never got one.
5. i didnt sleep through the night until i was 4. my mom reminds me.
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7. when my mom's sister babysat us, she never let me out of the play pen.
8. i never liked school and never felt happy there or safe. it was prison to me.
9. i very likely suffered from social anxiety and ADD as a child. nobody noticed i guess.
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13. i married my first husband after being with him for 18 mos. and only because i wanted to be a mom. i had just turned 19.
14. i hardly knew him and felt no physical or emotional attraction towards him whatsoever. it might as well have been an arranged marriage. i dont even like tall men(he's 6'4). i also hate pot and cigarrettes, he smoked both.
15. i stayed with him but he left me when the kids were 3 & 1 1/2. he didnt love me either. he liked 3 other chicks. none of them like him.
16. the kids spents Sundays with him until , when they were 10 & 12, he went crazy. they werent safe with him after that. doug still sees him but Kris does not speak to him. long story and TMI.
17. doug sees him as a friend. Yogi is their Daddy and kris and yogi are extremely bonded as father and daughter.
18. Yogi was my room mate when i was pregnant with doug. he lived upstairs and krisin and he adored each other. she used to sneak up there and eat cheezits from under his couch cushions LOL
19. yogi loved Kris way before he loved me. that was ok with me.
20. we were married 2 years after my divorce. the check to the JP bounced, we were so poor.
21. i have never been so in love in my life, ever.
22. i'm terrified he will die young like his mother did. she was 60 and had a rare cancer that killed her 12 mos. after she was diagnosed, Kendyl was just 6 mos. old. he was DEVASTATED.
23. Cymbalta helps lol
24. i take Cymbalta for anxiety and phobias.
25. i didnt drive until i was 25. was terrified of killing someone. had no self trust or self worth i think.
26. Yogi changed all that. I'm fat, but i like myself a lot now.
27. i am tired of being fat, but am always hungry. dieting makes me grouchy and mean to my kids. fat is better.
28. i love peanut butter A LOT.
29. i am addicted to diet soda(pop).
30 i brush my teeth 4 times a day, minimum.
31. tetracycline, an acne drug, made my teeth lose their color, thats why they look translucent or blue in some pictures.
32. my dentist prescribed me a special whitener that helps, but its pricey and burns my gums.
33. i still get acne, even after taking accutane for a year when i was 28, which nearly did me in. it didnt work.
34. having to use birth control the entire year i was on Accutane made me sad.
35. i have had more miscarriages than i can count on 2 hands. more than a baseball team.
36. Kendyl healed my heart. she is all of them rolled into one little angel.
37. i love photography.
38. i want to build a log home.
39. i'm scared of spiders. so is kris. so is uncuh LOL
40. i dont like swimming. its gross to me, no idea why.
41. i love thunder & lightening. i get so excited. so does Kendyl. i also love hail, even though it ruins my car.
42. i love my Dog and want him to live forever.
43. my favorite Grampa wasnt even my grampa at all. he was my neighbor's. he loved me just the way i was. he lived a long time.
44. i was very very close to my x husbands father, right up until the day he died june 12th 2007. we were best friends. his own daughter didnt speak to him but for some reason i loved him. kendyl adored him and still remembers him. he suffered repeated heart attacks for 20 years.
45. i want a serious breast lift and tummy tuck.
46. i love frogs.
47. i am not a fan of the Olympics but my Mother LIVES FOR IT.
48. my mom and sister love to quilt, crochet, needle point, cross stitch, knit and make clothing. i cant sew on a button and don't care to learn. i have people for that.
49. i love to write, take pictures and play word games.
50. i love music and need it every day like a drug. it owns me, i swear. i can't function without it. what a great addiction!
51. i collect american flags, especially pre WWII flags, and antique baseball mitts.
52. i just started collecting vintage baseball bats and have a 1946 Johnny Pesky autographed Louisville Slugger on the way from EBay right now. i cant wait to see it!
53. i have no space for what I collect LOL
54. i love baseball.
55. secretly, i am disappointed that Kendyl loves soccer. i can tell she will want to play and i cannot stand soccer lol. oh well!
56. it hurts that i love jackson more every year, even though he drives me insane, and he loathes me more every week.
57. it feels weird knowing every night when you go to sleep, that someone in your house wants you to die.
58. i think i want to facilitate adoptions professionally in the future, but need that degree in social work first.
59. i am so awesome at Wheel Of Fortune, it would blow your mind.
60. my sister is a biker with tattoos. but shes way cuter than most and can read. she prefers the term Motorcyle Enthusiast.
61. my sister posesses a genious IQ, so does my Father. she is a MENSA member.
62. both of my parents suffer with anxiety too.
63. i love peanut butter oreos.
64. i enjoy the 4th of July more than any other day of the year. its the pictures i think.
65.i really should be paying attention to my kids instead of writing this list, so i will continue later on!