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Saturday, July 18, 2009

been one of those weeks


things are never exactly what or how you think they are. i just had one of those weeks where, instead of wishing you were a fly on the wall, you're wishing you weren't. You hear stuff you don't want to hear through the grape vine..., stuff about you, your family, your kids, your whole life. Everyone has an opinion, and it's not always what you think it is. And, once you hear what one person thinks, whether it's just their twisted, unfair opinion of who you are and what you chose to do with your life, or clear cut misconception about you, you wish you didn't hear it because it makes you wonder what all those other "nice to my face" people really think. People love to judge others, instead of themselves; i'm sure i am no different. We all do it. Human nature. But it sucks. Is it insecurity? poor self worth? boredom? vanity? all of the above? it has taken me over a week to even process and get over the shock of what was said about my family. I can't go into it, too many readers now, but suffice it to say, i've heard enough and i'm not going to let it rent any more space in my head. NO VACANCY. It's a slippery slope i have no intention of plumetting down.
Yogi has been on a business trip for a few days, i pick him up at midnight. I missed him very much. as long as my marriage and family are happy and solid, who gives a shit about anything else? right? they can all bite me.
we are going off to do something fun as a family tomorrow, but i have no idea what. Yogi may be more tired than hes expecting to be.
i havent taken any new cool pictures in the last few days. i failed lol.
have i mentioned im tired of DIRT??? and humidity? OY. i had to use a finger nail brush to scrub shawns knees in the tub tonight! yikes!

5 comments:

C said...

We are currently the abyss of rumors right now. Leaving the church ... to buy an RV park. People take those two pieces of information and fill in the middle with all SORTS of stuff.

I want my "No Vacancy" sign to be neon.

shastastevens said...

I'm so sorry Ali! For what it's worth I think you're great. I think we all go through it--we know what it means to work really hard and have it look like we're no good. People make assumptions and it hurts. At least they could have the courtesy to say so!

*virtual hug*

Mothering4Money said...

Who gives a rat's ass what they think? Fuck 'em all. Fuck em' all to hell!

Are you still sporting the blonde hair? Sexy You. ;)

Loved the black & white or charcoal pic of shawn with the bubbles left in color. I enjoy playing with picnik too. Have you checked out BeFunky.com? It's kinda the same concept. I can't do either from home with this slow ass dial up internet.

I'm going to be a couple of states closer to you in a couple of weeks. You should come to the beach!

Anonymous said...

Opinions are like assholes.... I know exactly what you mean- this can be a very lonely path.

Anonymous said...

Oooh Ali I am the QUEEN of being talked about(6 years now people get OVER it). If you only KNEW. I'm used to it but it doesn't ever get any easier and it still hurts.