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Sunday, August 9, 2009

what a week!

this was HUGE to all of us. he actually took HER hand to cross the street!

baby Jake

Yogi's 2 "Baby Mamas"

sorry I've hardly blogged in a week. I really needed to do a lot around here and also had so much swimming around in my head and wanted to wait until some things resolved.. well.. not resolved but, i don't know what the hell i'm talking about. Calls came in, I made decisions about my own future, we made plans about OUR future, Tim & I are doing a lot of work to the outside of the house and we all worked together to spread loam, plant grass, remove shutters, scrub vinyl siding...... work, work, work. but the place needs it! blue or sage shutters? hmmm??? Anyway, the highlight of the week? ya ready for this??? you sure????

SHAWN IS A BIG BROTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

no, not me! Shawn's birth Mom had a baby boy on March 17th! She finally decided to tell me about it this week. It all started with an e mail, apologizing for "not reaching out" or responding to a text i had sent her last month. then she dropped this big news on me! she was embarrassed about being pregnant again when Shawn was only 11 mos. old, so she kept it to herself. She was married 9.5 mos. before the baby came, but they have decided to divorce :(. She has moved from the Airforce base into some off base housing even closer to us! We went to visit her today, and it only took half an hour to get there. I sure never thought in a million years she would live 30 minutes away! She's in a beautiful apartment in a beautiful area, just her and her beautiful son, Jakob Elijah. He & shawn look nothing alike, but they do have their Mama's big grin and crater dimples. Yogi fell hard for the baby and we all had such a good time. she burst into tears when she met shawn, shes still so shocked at his reddish blonde hair and pale skin color, but felt an instant connection to him and says he looks just like his Father. He was shy at first and terrified of the elevator, but warmed up and even let her hold his hand to cross the street at the park on base. We ate lunch at Friendly's, played at the park and spent about 5 hours total with her. She will be deployed in March, and Jake will live with her Mother in AR until she returns . I wish he could stay with us! But I'd have a hard time when he moved back with her! We all decided we'd like to get together once a month, so the boys can be brubbies and she and Shawn can have the relationship they deserve. I'm not sure who said it, but i once read the quote, "Adoption is the only tragedy in existence that one is expected to celebrate." I get it. Placing Shawn was L's decision, but I have always had this sense of guilt over stealing another woman's baby. That's just me, i know others don't feel that way, but.... I have. Yogi has. This is for the best. Yogi affectionately refers to L. as "My Baby Mama". LOLOLOL she thought it was cute. She's a wonderful Mother to Jakob and was great with my kids. She's mellow, sweet, responsible and mature. She stands up for what she believes in and is VERY strong. I am so proud of her. Today made me feel good and I will sleep very well. We often talked about what we would do if we got "The Call" that L. was pregnant again and wanted us to adopt another baby. She was pregnant when we had those conversations lol. Maybe I had a feeling, I don't really know. I'm glad it went this way though, 2 under 2 would be tough do do(again-20 years later)and we just don't have the time, space or the finances to do another adoption. But would we have found a way? YES. we want them to know each other and would have hated to see her 3rd child(her first son turned 6 in July) go to yet a 3rd family! THIS IS BETTER!
happy day :)


Erin said...


Justju said...

Awwwww.....what an awesome day! Looks like they hit it off beautifully. I pray that she and little Jake will continue to be a part of little Shawn's life...and yours & awesome, Ali. What a blessing! :*)

Mike and Katie said...

open adoption provides such a unique opportunity. it will be wonderful to spend time with her. christiana's birth mom said she felt ashamed , too, and that's why she didn't want to meet us. i hope she changes her mind at some point in time.